Mercury, Ford’s habitually ignored mid-level luxury brand will get a variation of the C-segment platform underpinning the 2012 Ford Focus It’ll suposedly debut as an LA Auto Show concept according to Automobile. But what will it be called?
Ford’s global compact platform can become just about anything, serving as work van, CUV, MPV, coupe, compact and badass hot hatch in Europe. As much as we’d like to see a Mercury-based variation of the Focus RS (Capri Part Duex, anyone?) this is more likely to be a four-door or five-door compact to give Lincoln-Mercury dealers something smaller and cheaper to offer.
Given Ford’s recent hard-on for historical nomenclature (which we wholeheartedly approve when the shoe fits), what classic Mercury nameplate should they resurrect? Unfortunately, they’ve already ruined Montego and Zephyr — so what else is left? Comet? Lynx? Capri? What do you think? [Automobile]
@dtremit:
I second this, FF and MM.
MarauderMan
@British_Looks_British_Reliabil…: Yeah, I wish they would bring back the GodsHead Logo, but perhaps if they make an old school special edition, but other than that, I doubt it.
MarauderMan
Mercury Inglorious Basterd
snap_understeer_ftw
If history is any indicator, we’re due for another Marauder, for a two year stint, but since its the focus up for grabs, that’s not happening.
My best bet would be that its going to be the Comet. I can see the commercial now. Jill Wagner is bending over looking into a telescope, and cutting to the eye piece, you can see that she spies the pair of focus and comet in view.
Or perhaps a Meteor if they go for a FF/MM thing.
MarauderMan
@Novaload: RIMSHOT!
DoctorNine
@petersterncan: there was briefly a Capri 4-door sedan in 1967, when the Comet models got on their own separate series, Caliente, Cyclone and Capri
[www.oldcarbrochures.com]
[www.oldcarbrochures.com]
In 1968 and 1969, the Montego replaced the Caliente and Capri nameplates and eclipsed the Comet line who was only offered in 2-door version [www.oldcarbrochures.com]
[www.oldcarbrochures.com]
In 1970 there was no Comet but it came back for the 1971 model year as the counterpart of the Ford Maverick.
And for the ad, bring back the big cat! Maybe they could do a remake of the ad “Capri……at the sign of the cat” [www.youtube.com]
stephdumas
I think the Mercury Mooby would be good.
cgarison
@Lotte: Careful with that, you’ll have our resident Tempo fanatic explaining to us why the Tempo name is too good for that.
Polk High All City 1966
Oh, how about “Mercury Mustard.”
“This is not your broker’s Grey Poupon. It’s hot stuff!”
Novaload
@dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity: Got it. The new Mercury “FBC”!
Novaload
@Jim7: A close second to the Hg.
cgarison
@DoctorNine: Lose the “ver” and you’re close.
Novaload
Topaz, for a few good laughs.
Jowo72
@leicester: Winner!
cgarison
@Neener: Good luck getting AAA to come out to “Get your Mucus running”.
Rockford Brodie would take a red pig over a stainless slug any day of the week
@Jude Butler: I’m just a poor brand
I need no sympathy
Because I’m easy come, easy go
Little high, little low
Anyway, buy a Ford
Doesn’t really matter to me, to me…
smokyburnout
funny, I thought Lincoln was their mid-level luxury brand
ManicSquirrel: Statistical Mania
Mercury Badger!
(still commenting before word searching, props to HammSammich!)
Scoutch wants differential treatment
@jon_daniels: …well? Go ahead! Say something thought provoking and truly funny!
Scoutch wants differential treatment
Mercury Rising?
(Inches of) Mercury?
Phoenix Mercury?
Mercury Muppet?
Mercury Methusalah?
KAdams1476
@Blackened2k6: And they should have a sporty ‘S’ model… the TitS
And then have a special Turbo (direct) Injection Extra Sport model… TitTIES
petersterncan
@comet65: The Goldthwait?
Scoutch wants differential treatment
@Blue387: Looks more like R2D2′s butt-plug
Scoutch wants differential treatment
The Mercury “Jan Brady” to reflect what Mercury has become, the middle child no one cares about.
VMA1T
Oh and if it turns out to be too heavy for what it is, then they should call it the TurnPork Cruiser
petersterncan
@philibuster: Goddammit! It’s really f**kin’ difficult to scan threads to see if someone’s got there before you with this new “see/hide n replies” so-called enhancement Gawker Media has foisted upon us, even using Firefox’s word search feature.
Props to you.
Scoutch wants differential treatment
@Jude Butler: And if they call it the Genoa, they should have a high performance “Salami” edition…
petersterncan
@Smitty: COTD
petersterncan
@British_Looks_British_Reliabil…: Mercury Cutlass…
petersterncan
They could call it the Comet, Lynx or Bobcat.
I don’t think the Capri name is ruined… the last Capri was an interesting car and wasn’t a POS at all.
It’s just that the Capri name belongs on a 2 door coupe, not a 4 door.
petersterncan
Could someone smarter than me please explain why on earth the Mercury nameplate still exists?
BlandonNimrat
@jolietjake: I see what you did there. +1
Scoutch wants differential treatment
@Jude Butler: I don’t know that Merc was ever big on Italian city names, but wouldn’t they go for, um, Monza?
Scoutch wants differential treatment
The Soft Focus? Nah, the critics would pan it. Ooo… I got it!
“The Mercury Zoom”
I like the alliterative classic names, seems like Marauder has never really worked, though. I’m voting for METEOR
Scoutch wants differential treatment
Caliente – which was the top Comet model in the mid-’60s.
tonyola
how’s “Pointless” grab ya?
monsterajr
“Mocus”!
doctorq
One of the epithets of Mercury, is the Celtic Rhineland deity Avernus. Has a nice ring to it.
DoctorNine
They also ruined the name of Capri with that last piece of shit they offered to compete with Miata.
Comet.
Old_Car_Guy
they should call it ford fake and mercury gay. The fake and gays can go together.
bdon
@leicester:
leicester
@Blackened2k6: Those are bird names, right?
leicester
The Mercury Hg?
leicester
@smokyburnout:
Continental?
It was a standalone make from 1956-60.
And “Freddie” should be the car’s name.
Jude Butler
@skaycøg: Well, I’m out of obscure felines.
Ruthless, If you let me
Meteor is good; Quicksilver is good; but me, I gotta go with Retrograde.
Jim7
@punksmurph: Plus then the car would be better than the thing it is named after, good thinking.
rigidjunkie
Lynx. Bring back the cat names, dangit.
underwear-ninja
Mercury Boob.. or tit… yea tit is cute right?
Mercury Tit. I’d rent one.
Blackened2k6
Mercury Media; perfect for all the tech crap they’ll mount on the dash
And since no-one asked a Fiesta based Merc; te Miniscule
3304HL
Mistress.
GreenN_Gold
Mercury Runt. Speck. Tumbleturd.
Comet would be good. I fear Capri is tainted by the last doodlewagen that wore that name…
Slave2anMG
We could call it MRS HOT ASS.. after the spokeswoman…
She deserves something.. for sticking around a brand that isnt worth a shit.
70barracuda
How bout..
LATE TO BREAKFAST!
70barracuda
I love it when you make it easy for us by providing the answer in the image of the post.
Brian
@skaycøg: nevermind – that’ll teach me to skim and not read.
British_Looks_British_Reliability
Oh, poor Mercury, whatever shall we do with you? You’re suffering from what I like to call “Oldsmobile Syndrome.” Can’t do this, or you steal sales from Lincoln. Can’t do that, or you steal sales from Ford.
That being said, how about Comet (like others in this post have mentioned) with an ecoboosted version being the Cyclone?
And get rid of the waterfall ‘M’ and bring back the Roman messenger (c’mon, you did it for the Marauder, you know you want to).
British_Looks_British_Reliability
I love how this article starts off with reminding people what Mercury is, like it’s Lasalle or Hudson or something.
That said, yes I hope they call it the Capri. This would actually be the perfect chance for Ford to define Mercury as, well, as something/anything. Name it the Capri and instead of giving Ford a performance Focus give it to Mercury. Do the whole “front drive replacement for the Mustang” idea again except now I think they would know better than to replace the Mustang. Heck, they should just keep Ford as the all American truck and big sedan nameplate and give Mercury all ‘dem funny Euro cars dat people lub so much.
tintern
Since Milan is taken (Shit hole city in Italy) than I would have to say the Mercury Detroit. Keep naming cars after shitty places.
punksmurph
I like the Comet, Lynx, Capri, Bobcat names. Other names to consider are Monarch, Monterey, Parklane (who was featured in the tv series Hawaii Five-0 [www.mjq.net] ) or Meteor once used by Mercury in 1962 and 1963, it had a more longer lifespan in Canada from 1949 to 1981 [www.oldcarbrochures.com]
[www.oldcarbrochures.com]
[www.ford.ca]
stephdumas
Mercury Topaz.
And call the Focus the Tempo??
Lotte
Come to think of it, “Focus Based Compact” has a nice ring to it…
dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity
The Lynx LN7.
Baby beater Benz
Mercury Blast, because…I said so.
Motor_Yakuza
@SinisterSaracen: Yes, apparently, but I cannot for the life of me explain why it is still in business.
gman1023
How ’bout Meteor? Recalls those wacky half-Mercury Fords sold in Canada…
dtremit
@Ruthless, If you let me: Cheetah
skaycøg
The re badge.
carguy
Y?
SkaHimself
They already ruined the name of my beloved fox body Capri with a tiny metro-like shitbox, so why not recycle that name?
FordTuffMcgruff
They should call it the Placeholder, or the Long Slow Decline, or the Nobody Has Invested Anything In This Brand So It’s Slipping From Relevance.
optional flavor
remember when comments on this site were either thought provoking or truly funny? back when some actual thought went into replies? i miss those days
jon_daniels
Call it Bubba or Wilbur.
BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ
@SCMX5: your pick*
SCMX5
Mercury branded Focus…MUCUS!
BigRocket
Lets stick with the photographic theme and call it the F-Stop.
Prismatist
@skaycøg: Oncilla!
Ruthless, If you let me
@Number_Six: On my way to YouTube,thankyou sir!
layabout
I like the Comet name. They should offer a Focus-based coupe and convertible as the Mercury Comet.
Blue387
@spectra: Isn’t that a Gemini capsule?
Blue387
@Ruthless, If you let me: Bengal. Does that mean I win?
skaycøg
Mercury Muskrat
PDQ2
@Buckus: Weird thing is, I owned a Tracer once and I had completely forgotten until I read your comment. Seriously, hadn’t thought of it in ten years.
Number_Six
@Timtoolman, Oklahoma bound!: Sure they did. It’s nothing but a murdered out Crown Vic.
Prismatist
Bobcat (Ford Pinto twin)? How about Monarch (Ford Granada) in sticking with the ‘M’ theme? Then there’s always Topaz….
TheSurlyOne
I vote Capri or Catalonia or lynx or Merchant or Monteban or Mercado … take you pick!
SCMX5
@layabout: I am pretty sure she is the most attractive American woman ever. You can see her in action on the TV show Wipeout.
Number_Six
Falcon to reflect confused lineage.
Pigeon for redundancy.
skitter
Call it the Mercury My.
ozyran
@skaycøg: Margay.
That’s all I got off the top of my head right now.
Ruthless, If you let me
The ‘Mercury Poisoning’
Smitty
@Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it: I’m not gonna lie to you, all I can think of is Mercury Mahogany. As in, well, you know…
Number_Six
the Blur.
hmmcolor
This is a joke, right?
Well, if it’s not a hoax, let’s name it the Merkur XR4Y.
Number_Six
@Ruthless, If you let me: Civet
(No fair…you named 3).
skaycøg
Or Maybe the Mercury Pluto. Because like how Pluto isn’t a planet anymore, Mercury isn’t a respectable brand to me anymore.
Or the Mercury Gallardo 560-4 SV. That’d sell.
Nurburgring
The “Non Pertinent”
bugattatra needs a USDM 4AGE real bad
The Profit-Margin.
Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet
Mercury Soft Focus.
philibuster
XR4Ti-two?
JC Whitless
@skaycøg: Kodkod.
Ruthless, If you let me
Mercury Capsule
spectra
How ’bout the Mercury Milf.
BartMack
@IN THE FACE!: I shake my fist at you for that terrible Capri joke. The Euro imports were amazing cars and were better Mustangs than the (then-modern) Mustangs were.
It’s not my fault someone decided to be retarded and move to the Fox chassis in ’79! And don’t blame them for that Australian abortion from the ’90s, either!
The ’70s Capri will always be in my heart. *sigh*
Bartoni
@Ruthless, If you let me: Puma.
skaycøg
If it is easily identifiable as a Mercury branded Focus (as opposed to the Mazda3), they should just call it a Badger.
HammSammich’s pride hurts more than his sprained wrists after high-siding his trumpet.
Le Car Rentale
TRAMS_AM
Mercury? The should call it “Quits”.
Murph
Anorexic Cougar
Vanderhuge
@skaycøg: Edit: Damnit! I totally skimmed the article and they already suggested my answer. My new answer will be the Caracal or Serval.
Ruthless, If you let me
Names from the past?
Medalist
Comet – my vote
Capri
Cyclone
Bobcat
Lynx
Tracer
Topaz
Mystique
Italian cities:
Genoa
Ancona
Matera
Messina
Novara
Vicenza
But these are just off the top of my head.
Jude Butler
Mercury Quicksilver, if it’s a hot hatch. Mercury Thallium if they want to signal the start of a new period for the brand. Mercury Jupiter if it’s out of this world and/or mythologically profitable.
duurtlang
The last generation of Capri NEVER HAPPENED. Give me an ’83 with the HO v8 and the bubble-back rear window, please.
zenneth
@abgwin: I THINK I know where you’re heading with this line of thought, but the Mercury Snatch probably wouldn’t go over too well, nor the Mercury Vertical Smile, or the Mercury Bearded-Clam…
HiramJahoovafat
Bring back the Tracer! And the metal grille!
Buckus
I’d say Comet, it was the Falcons brother and the least expensive Merc in the 60′s.
Fluxx
Well, if you asked me, I’d call it a name that has historic Ford family significance, a name that relates to the Mercury line of cars, AND is sympathetic in foreshadowing the ‘success’ of the brand…
I bring you -
The Edsel…
HiramJahoovafat
Bobcat, because it’s probably not going to be anything special
comet65
meh.
Forgetful – GT Junkie
The Member.
As in “Hey, ‘member that other car Ford used ta make? Not Edsel, the other one. Merkur? Nah. Forget it.”
smokyburnout
…Mercury is still in business?
SinisterSaracen
awesome, platform rebranding, I thought ford learned their lesson about this already
Tom Fuller
Ocelot.
skaycøg
XR4Ti
jon_daniels
Well they also have a hard-on for “M”, so I’d say Milquetoast
Roast Beef, now with two drunk driver totalled cars! Jerks
Switch
jolietjake
I’d go with Mercury MUCUS. It’s new, fresh and goes like snot!
Joe-Btfsplk
go with capri. I really want mercury to come out with a miata-fighter and call it the comet. I knew a guy that had this beautiful restored comet. I’ve been in love with it since
Wishes MINIs had whale tails
Redstone
JC Whitless
How about “Ridondante”.
Dammit again. I really, really should read all the comments. Nurburgring beat me to it.
wheatieboy
Mercury is a “luxury” brand? I always thought it was the sub-standard el-cheapo off-brand of Ford…
They should call it the “Extraneous-Trim-Delux”
or
“I-can’t-believe-its-not-a-focus!”
or
“Crapi” I mean “Capri”
IN THE FACE!
The Copycat.
TR3-A
The Mercury Redundant.
Nurburgring
@Roberto G.: …you wanted to see this reply… you nosey!
Roberto G.
@Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it: I am interested in this product and or service.
soulpilgrim
A mistake?
dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity
@Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it: Oh she’s on my list now & now i shall create a list of things i’d like to do to her
layabout
Put Mercury on your list or jill will pop a cap in yo ass!
Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it
Bobcat! Ushering in a return to feline-based names for Mercury, such as Cougar, Lynx and…. and…..
abgwin
Roberto G.
Retrograde
Chrisnyc1213
Being that the original Comet was based on the 60-65 Falcon platform, which was a small car for the time, I think a Focus based Comet would be fitting.
t5brick
@Neener: Vomit?
Timtoolman, Oklahoma bound!
Commuter:
Who can argue against a 2 door shooting brake station wagon.
heck in 57 that was actually a small car in their product line.
joelja
@t5brick: Parbly.
Timtoolman, Oklahoma bound!
Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it
LN7
P161911 probably shoudn’t have
I gotta go with Mercury Mucus
Neener
@Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it: Who is she…….i think i love her
layabout
the Voyager
cargogh
Call it the “Wagner”
Bentoboxx, My Tank is full of it
I don’t care what it’s named as long as it’s attached to a wagon variant.
SecretAZNMan
Chevette?
LBJ’s Love Child
@Timtoolman, Oklahoma bound!: They will if it is used on a Focus based car.
t5brick
I’d probably go with the Capri. Comet’s my preferred name, but I don’t want them to use it for such a small car. (Plus, it’s kind of a sixties name anyway.)
Of course, knowing them, they’ll probably go with something nautical… the Mercury Boat Anchor may be truth-in-advertising, but it won’t help sell cars!
RäcinG73™
Marauder is really a great name, and they haven’t ruined it, yet.
Timtoolman, Oklahoma bound!